Ahimsa: Do No Harm

Oct 1

Scroll to the end of the post for October’s Playlist!

October 2024 Focus

The first Yama: Ahimsa

In Yoga we seek connection with ourselves and the world. Ahimsa is the first tool to finding that peace and connection. This month we will start down the 8 limb path of yoga and seek out ways to live in a way that flows with love and compassion.

What is the 8 Limb Path?

In the 2nd Century BCE Patanjali wrote the Yogic Sutras, these were short verses on the instruction of Yoga. Only one of the 7 of theses relates to body movement, Asana, (what most people think of when they think of Yoga). The other 7 map out a way to live in unity with yourself and the world. Often the 8 limb path is depicted as a tree with 4 big roots and 4 branches all connected and necessary. The 4 branches have to do with meditation and enlightenment, the preparation for this is the 4 roots which have to do with the body, breath and morality in restraint and observance.

Harm

There are 5 Yamas, restraints to live well. Restrain yourself from: violence, lies, theft, greed and excess

(oversimplification, but we’ll do deep dives on each).

Ahimsa means to do no harm or non-violence, but in a more practical sense it is the reduction or avoidance of harm to all things. Practicing Ahimsa is cultivating a attitude of harmony and universal benevolence.

A = Non Himsa = hurt, violence, harm

“ ahimsā-pratiṣthāyām tat-sannidhau vaira-tyāgaḥ

In the presence of one who is firmly established in nonviolence, hostility recedes.”

— Yogic Sutra 2.35

With hostility so present in our lives, and the world it’s hard to know where to start? It can be overwhelming to think about the big ways that violence is active, in destruction of the planet, mistreatment of animals and ecosystems, racism, sexism, colonialism, slavery, genocide, and war. Anyone committed to Ahimsa must be committed to ending violence in all it’s forms, but this work can start on a much smaller scale. I can not make global changes all by myself, but each small action makes a difference. I can reduce or eliminate my consumption of animal products and I can buy fair trade and local. I cannot end war, but I can root out hatred in myself. I cannot end racism but I can take a good look at my prejudices and perceptions. I can also write to my local representatives and vote for policies that combat the forces of harm in the world; protection for natural spaces, sustainability, equal rights, reparations, ceasefire and truce agreements. I can vote with my dollar and invest and shop in ways that reduce, prevent or alleviate harm. There are uncountable ways to use love to counter violence. Even something as simple as cheering someone on instead of killing their joy is practicing Ahimsa. No act of care is too small to count. I can think of times when a simple act of kindness changed everything for me and a shallow act of meanness really broke me open. Violent thoughts and words are just as important to curb before they become actions. Any act of violence against others, harms you too.

“All you need is love
All you need is love
All you need is love, love
Love is all you need”

— The Beatles

Now on the personal level

Self-control, emotional regulation and de-escalation are all skills that take time to cultivate. We have to be intentional or our emotions will rule us and we will have to deal with the consequences. Cycles of harm sometimes need a lot of work and a lot of time to break. Like with all of Yoga it is so important to start where you are and to ask for help. I’m someone who needs a teacher, accountability buddy or teammate to make lasting change in my life, someone to objectively see what’s going on and help to find better ways to process and deal with challenging emotions. For me that’s a combination of my family, friends, mentor and a therapist.

Parenting is hard, I am continually tested in ways I could not have imagined before. I need the support of my community for concrete practical help, but in ways I couldn’t foresee also moral and emotional support. There are times when I get so exhausted, frustrated and mentally numb that I need a time out from my beloved baby. I want to model for my daughter the best behavior because if I don’t learn to regulate my emotions how will she be able to? When you feel yourself reaching your limits take a time out. All sensations are temporary. Anger, hurt, and frustration can lead to violent words or actions unless you interrupt their escalation.

Things I hope to teach my baby:

(and so first need to learn for myself and model consistently)

All emotions are welcome

Feelings are meant to be felt. When I bottle up something it will come crashing down later. Ahimsa also means non-judgment. Its ok to be sad or angry, the happy-go-lucky part of me sometimes struggles with this. Instead of self talk like “Ugg why am I so upset, it’s not a big deal get over it,” I will do less harm by processing my emotions, letting myself feel upset and then giving myself time to sit with it and let it go.

I am responsible for my body and my actions

I make the choice to shout or speak calmly, I make the choice to rage, fight and argue or to resolve things peacefully. It’s so easy for me to blame my actions on others “ I wouldn’t have said that if you hadn’t said___ first”. Therapy has helped me see that I really can’t control anyone but myself and if I’m acting without thinking that needs to change.

Ask for help when you need it

Gosh this one is so hard. Sometimes I feel like asking for help is admitting failure, but that’s not true. We all need help sometimes and some problems are too big. Some emotions are too heavy to carry alone

Take a deep Breath

Emotions live in our body and studies show that slow deep breathing can stimulate the parasympathetic nervous system to help us calm down. I know I have lashed out at someone when I was in fight or flight mode. The solution is then to observe when we feel triggered or anxious and reconnect with our body by breathing deeply or doing a grounding exercise.*

Empathy in Action

The golden rule of “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you”, is a great start for reducing harm. However true empathy begins when we listen to others and treat them how they ask to be treated. I might love a spontaneous hug, but not everyone does, it’s best to ask.

*One grounding exercise I love is a count down. List 5 things I can see, 4 things I can touch, 3 things I can hear, 2 things I can smell, and 1 thing I can taste (unless I’m eating this is just the inside of my mouth). Getting into your senses really helps avalanching emotions slow down.